I wrote of the journey I am taking a couple of posts back, and you, my imaginary friend, will be pleased, I think, to know that I leave in a few days time. My preparations are almost complete, and no doubt I shall find myself in busyness and doing very shortly, so this seems a good time to write more of my inner journey.
I find myself yearning for change, though naturally I am fearful at the same time…for who knows what change may entail? It is not change of scenery I am looking for, although I welcome new landscapes. And I do not think my essential inner nature shall change, although deeper insights and more compassion for myself might be on my list of self-improvements. While the journey is an actual physical movement, it is not a material quest I go on, but a spiritual one. ‘Spiritual’ is used advisedly: I am not searching for a real or metaphorical holy grail.
The deep nature of the journey is to write a love story, a love story on many levels. To practise a craft with skill and pleasure, rather than to conform to the mediocrity of small town. This mediocrity is rooted in getting along with one’s neighbours, perhaps – of fitting in, of not getting beyond oneself – it is a good-hearted notion at its best, but ultimately stultifying. To wander a freer landscape – less confined than even a large island, in any event! Though I believe freer in the sense, also, that there is room for different styles of living. To explore landscape and people and ethos of a culture different than my own, with openness and rejection of stereotypes and delight in the learning of new things. To kiss the boy in the tender spot behind his ear and to find joy in the sureness of living precisely as one wants to live, every day. Shall these things come to pass? You shall know of my efforts at bringing them into being, at any rate.
Both intimacy and solitude are required for the writing of a great love story, I believe, and maybe a willingness to travel the byways and lesser known roads. I look forward to sharing them with you.
You are more the romantic than I, VL. I love love, yet in a different way. I think adventuring is right and just and may be what infuses life with meaning. Else it threatens to remain a concept, and what a shame that would be if one has the opportunity to embrace the road, so to speak. Enjoy! And blessings.
Tender memories and vivid beguilings, VivianLea. You’ve rousted sensations of nubility whilst awakening new thoughts that are … ah …silly for a man on the cusp of 60. Good there be distance between us this morning – else I be tempted to attempt to tarnish more than one love that I hold most dear. Thank you for giving me pause to take this morning’s first hour to imagine upon your words.
“The truth is of course is that there is no journey. We are arriving and departing all at the same time.” …David Bowie
“Yeehawww!” …Slim Pickens’ last line in Dr. Strangelove
Sig, the most fascinating thing about life is that we are arriving and departing all at the same time…and often we don’t know it. Yeehaw, my friend, thank you 🙂
I just YouTubed Slim (Major Kong) in that final scene and I was wrong, VivianLea. Actually, he exclaims, “Wahoo!” as he rides that bomb on his final journey.
Your blessings are welcome, Bela, and thank you. I try to find a little adventure every day, for the romantic in me demands it…though I do believe a love story is a different sort of adventure. But then, this is a different kind of love story…not so much girl meets boy, as girl meets self – and swears to love herself forever after…
Thank you again 🙂